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Gay kids need love,too: States urged to fight discrimination in foster homes

On Tuesday, June 25th, 2013

Appeals Court Rules State Ban Adoption For Gays UnconstitutionalLife is tough enough for a foster child. Imagine being a foster child who is gay and placed in a home where they are discriminated against based on their sexual orientation. Imagine being a child who is verbally abused with homophobic slurs and made to feel unwelcomed in a home that is supposed to be welcoming. This sort of discrimination and treatment of gay youth in the foster care system has presented enough of an issue that the federal health officials sent a letter in 2011 encouraging further training of caseworkers and foster parents on the issue according to the Associated Press on June 22.

The last thing a child needs is to feel more self-hatred of who they are. Considering the circumstances, many children are already placing self-blame on themselves for being taken out of the only homes that they have known. That’s why advocates in the states of Florida, California, Connecticut, Illinois and Massachusetts have increased efforts in, not only training caseworkers, but recruiting foster parents for LGBT youth and assigning mentors.

Officials have made is clear that they don’t want to force a child to disclose their sexuality but want to place them in an environment where they feel comfortable to come out and have the support they need to feel accepted.

Kamora Herrington, mentoring program director of True Colors, an organization that helps gay foster youths in Connecticut said that she has had conversations with youth in the system who are afraid to come out because of “how staff treated their friends in the system after they came out.”

One child, a lesbian girl, was kicked out of her home in Connecticut after the family’s grandmother moved in and opposed homosexuality. The result was the girl hitch-hiking across the country in hopes of finding a more accepting community. These sort of situations are what states like Massachusetts are working to improve.

Massachusetts was one of the first states to open a co-ed group home for gay foster teens after it was reported that too many of them were living on the streets. About 100 foster youths have lived in the home which also offers a mentoring program as well as life skills classes that teaches the kids the basics of cooking and budgeting. Tools that can help them live a life on their own.

But the issue is recruiting gay foster parents. States are pushing for this, but it is tough because most LGBT couples are looking to adopt and don’t have much interest in becoming foster families. Therefore gay youths in foster care are pretty much left out. Robin McHaelen, executive director of True Colors said:

“Many of our kids have been told they’re not family appropriate: We’re not even going to look for a family for you. We’re going to look for a group home.”

This is a reason why efforts have increased in states like Illinois, where child welfare officials have started the process of hiring 29 new recruiters to find foster families and mentors for young gay youth and Florida, where a regional task force on gay foster youths have been set up to increase training for Department of Children and Families caseworkers. Efforts have also increased in places like New York City, where a campaign has been launched to recruit gay and lesbian foster parents in an effort to diversify the foster system and create more welcoming home for LGBT children.

Overall efforts which includes further training and education should help strive towards better situations for gay foster kids. The states are doing their parts, but it’s time for foster parents and mentors to step up and provide the environments these children need to grow and explore who they are as they are.

About - Tarringo T. Vaughan always believed he had a love affair with literature. One of the first pictures he saw of himself was of him at maybe the age of three or four year’s old sitting with a book in his hand. But for Tarringo, growing up in the depths of the inner city both in Boston, MA and Springfield, MA made him believe that expression through the literary voice was un-cool and unattainable. As a very quiet and shy child he learned it became very valuable in his self expression. Born in 1976, Tarringo was the first child, grandchild and nephew in a family that had grown accustomed to struggle. His mother was a teenager who quickly lost the support of my father who today he knows very little of. These aspects of his life triggered the inspiration of his pen.

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